"Pushy, aggressive, stubborn, arrogant, and always right" - these were the first 5 associations thrown at me when I asked the participants what was the first thing that comes to their minds when they hear the word `Israelis`…

 

I am holding a seminar "How to work with Israelis". 25 participants from all over the world, all work in a big computer company in California. The common denominator is that they work with Israelis.

 

After the first vent of emotions the more balanced words come (after all we are in the USA and people are polite, balanced and professional): "easier in person, innovative, hard working, collaborative…"

 

We proceed with the training. They describe the daily challenges of working with Israelis and ask questions like:

 

• How to make them (the Israelis) listen?

• How to win arguments?

• How to get my message through?

• How to stop negotiating over every small detail and not to feel exhausted?

• How to make them follow the procedures they themselves have previously set?

 

I feel for these people. I know exactly what are they talking about. I myself came to Israel 24 years ago and had to learn all the answers the hard way. During the last few years I often fly to other countries to deliver corporate trainings. Every time I fly somewhere, I have to remind myself to restrain my long time acquired Israeli habits of communication and behavior.

 

Here in Israel you have to be quick, informal, spontaneous, pushy, independent, self confident. You have to be instantly ready to defend your point of view, to improvise all the way to your goal, be prepared to take over whatever you believe you deserve, because "nothing will come to you on its own".

 

Life in Israel is harsh and this affects everyone who lives here. The climate is hot and dusty, the threat of war is endless, making a living is hard, the country is small and everyone knows, or at least has a friend who knows, almost everyone.  The country of one degree of separation as Yossi Vardi defined it. Rumors spread with the speed of light.

 

If you live far away from Israel, (may it be India, California or Ukraine), if your primary means of communication is e-mail and the only thing you have in common with Israelis is working on the same project, it is easy to miss all the advantages of the Israeli culture. Natural human behavior: whatever works well we usually take for granted, we notice and eventually come to detest things that disturb us. 

 

Working globally, attitude is crucial. After all it is our attitude that defines how we interpret behaviors. When we are exhausted by miscommunication, Israeli honesty and directness can be seen as tactless and rude, assertiveness may be taken for aggression and stubbornness, creativity and improvisation may be seen as chaos and lack of discipline, realistic is cynical and self confident is arrogant. When we don't understand someone, we don't like them and, as a result, we tend to interpret his or her behavior in a negative way.

 

So, what shall you do?

 

If you are not an Israeli and need to work with them (us), it will be a valuable investment of time to get to know them closer and create meaningful bonding. This way, you'll get a chance to recognize their warmth, hospitality and openness. You'll see that they love a good conversation and they prefer making real friends rather just being friendly and polite. They are direct but at least you always know where the things stand with them. They may be unorganized, but they are always willing to help you. They may be very informal and sloppy dressed but that doesn't mean they are unprofessional. Sometimes they don't behave according to the codes of politeness that are accepted in other places, but they are very sincere, vital and passionate. (Read the nice article by a comedian Benji Lovitt: 65 more things I love about Israel.)

 

If you are an Israeli and you need to work with people in other countries you should keep one thing in mind: when you work globally some things are necessarily uncomfortable. If you do everything as you are used to here in Israel and you feel at ease, this probably means that there is someone out there who feels very uncomfortable. There are too many gaps that should be overcome and numerous bridges to be built. If you don't go half way towards the others, they need to cover all the way towards you. This may never feel as a fair play. In other words, you should inevitably stretch yourself out to do at least some things you possibly don't like and see as a waste of time.

 

You cannot cut the corners like most of us do here in Israel. You cannot change the procedures every other day or just skip them if you personally don't need them. You need to keep the documentation organized because people on the other side of the globe cannot chit chat with you over the lunch and be immediately updated. Never assume that the other person feels and understands things the way you do. Just pointing out the general direction is not enough when you work remotely. The information you transfer to the other part of the globe must be well organized and detailed.

 

Working globally is always an adventure. In order to enjoy this adventure we should learn to like people we work with. Sometimes it is not easy and requires an effort, but it is always rewarding. Thank you to all the wonderful participants and fascinating encounters I have at my trainings around the world.